The Influence of parents on children
In one article all the subtleties of parent–child relationships to disclose. Today we will consider only how negative words, name-calling child with no ability to control your emotions affect humans in the future.
In fact, the influence of parents on children is difficult to assess. Since there are other authoritative adults, some idols in adolescents, books, all of which also lay much in person, then in the amount of impact on his values and behavior.
In psychology one experiment that no one dares to repeat. It was conducted on children orphans.
The children were divided into two groups. Those who are lucky enough and they were in the first group received approval and constantly praised them for any attempt to properly and competently to speak, and generally favored any statement. In the second group did not skimp on harsh word, but any hint of a speech impediment immediately condemned, child publicly humiliated, and even those who normally spoke, they were called “pathetic stutterers”.
According to the results of the experiment, children in the second group, which had no defect of speech become stutterers. The defect of speech is preserved in adult life.
Since 1939, this experiment did not dare because of humanity to repeat.
Let’s look at the adult lives of many of us. Many acquired complexes and are not able to do something not because you physically can’t or are not capable, but because in childhood they gained a lot of restrictions, by children interrupted or ridiculed.
Many will say that their children solely love and not allow itself to nothing. But if you even look the part, in the hearts of often even when these parents irritation allow myself is not something that is unnecessary and not acceptable.
Need not go far, you can just walk along the square of your city, where mothers walking with children, many times you will hear “Pig – again mess”, “don’t go – will go down in pain”, “Stop screaming – idiot”, “Shut up”, “get” etc., etc.
I love these mother of his children – Yes.
What they do to them?
In fact it’s the exact same thing as Wendell Johnson without control group repeated many families.
What are the consequences?
A grown man afraid to start doing – not to be mistaken. Fear to change jobs, a family, a country, or to start a business, etc.
Many fear punishment from the head, spouse, and other persons and prefer to sit below the grass, the stillness of the water.
Someone behaves negatively, because in childhood they got attention from their parents.
Yes, it’s not always 100% of what you yell in the sandbox. There is a second parent and you need to look at him, and his relationship with him. And anyway the fact is there is a second balancing side? Alas, many people brought up in incomplete families. There is still the authoritative teacher. Don’t know what school you attended, but our Director of teaching history could afford to yell at us that we’re idiots, and he is not alone did that, though met and excellent teachers.
The child absorbs all the variety of relations to him.
And eventually, sooner or later, and says to himself, “I – idiot,” “I can’t learn”, “I can’t”, etc. are Not always consciously, but formed a certain attitude on how to treat it in childhood. There are people who are able to realize this and to just stop, but often times it is difficult to make yourself, especially to 14 years.
So unfolds the appropriate script. With all this, the influence of parents on children is the basis.
For if no luck with the teacher, the parents and only the parents can teach their kids how to properly respond, and not to stand on the eyes nerd.
If you are currently in the process of upbringing of her offspring, on time keep track of all this and learn to discuss things with your child, if you want to keep contact with him when he grows up.
And as they say, start with yourself, because before you can cultivate a harmonious, successful person, you need to become such.
Where to start?
For independent work, it is best to identify their values, problems that are inherent in you and prevent you to raise children, hinder change your life. That is, the detection time of all what is in your frame your past, about what we talked about in this article. And of course then you need to make some changes.
Equipment such a profound elaboration can be found here .
The task for today is to act.
And not to read, stop being sad and keep doing the same thing it did before, because you are not my life, not the quality of life of their offspring are not perfect.
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